bliumchik | (no subject)

Sometimes I wonder why I'm so socially dysfunctional. It can't be entirely pessimism on my part. I mean, I actually really can't tell where any particular action of mine falls on the scale between "standoffish" and "desperate." I know it's a pretty big scale, because I can usually place other people's actions on it, but when it comes to me it's binary. I feel like I'm either not reaching out enough or too much. And if I can't tell the difference I have to assume I'm being inappropriate at least some of the time - luckily I seem to have a reputation for eccentricity so quite a lot of it is probably dismissed as "that's just maggie" but...

I know there's a crucial period in childhood when you have to learn language, or you never will. I wonder when the crucial period is for emotional language, and I wonder if it works the same way. Because I'm pretty sure I missed a few years of it, and I rely on instinct for pretty much everything, so having deficient social reflexes is pretty sucky.

My body wants me to do nothing but eat and sleep. I seriously think I'm going into hibernation or something. Wah, I wish I was a bear. Bears don't have to worry about how they relate to other bears... bears relate to other bears by swiping them on the nose and stealing their fish. Also they can sleep through winter. And sleeping through winter and the HSC and all my remaining time at school is looking better and better.