(no subject)
Dec. 23rd, 2007 11:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bliumchikOh dear god. I just sat through an excruciating conversation with my mother about my uni preferences. Conclusions:
1. My mother does not want me to go to QUT because
1.a. she does not believe it is a reputable institution that future employers will look kindly upon
1.a.i. despite the recommendations of three of my teachers and it being in the top ten Australian universities
1.b. she does not believe I am capable of surviving outside the nest
1.b.i. this is an opinion shared by my grandmother
1.b.ii. note to self: valid point, work on this
2. My mother does want me to do "something with computers" because
2.a. something about them being the future
2.a.i. my mother's expertise on this topic: nil
2.b. something about opening up vast fields of gainful employment
3. My mother will strongly, nay, vehemently deny points 1 and 2.a.i
3.a. point 1 is however strongly enough implied to justify the deployment of logic to back her into a corner on the topic
4. Not unlike a mongoose the cornered mother is dangerous and will persist in claiming that everyone has grossly misinterpreted her clear, concise and rational discussion
4.a. this is commonly known as "bullshit"
5. My final decision will have to be made completely independently of my mother
5.a. because it's really quite difficult to sift the good advice out of the layers upon layers of
5.a.i. misconceptions
5.a.ii. parent-child projection
5.a.iii. emotional blackmail
5.a.iv. really stubborn misconceptions
5.a.v. defensive posturing
5.b. I don't think that's really sunk in with her
5.b.i. although I've tried to be blunt
6. If my final decision is pointing in a sort of queenslandy direction I can expect
6.a. further argument
6.a.i. identical to this one
6.a.ii. ad infinitum
6.b. little support
6.b.i. financially (we're SITKOMs, it's horrible)
6.b.ii. logistically
6.b.iii. emotionally (until she hits the "acceptance" stage)
In sum: look! A comedienne!
1. My mother does not want me to go to QUT because
1.a. she does not believe it is a reputable institution that future employers will look kindly upon
1.a.i. despite the recommendations of three of my teachers and it being in the top ten Australian universities
1.b. she does not believe I am capable of surviving outside the nest
1.b.i. this is an opinion shared by my grandmother
1.b.ii. note to self: valid point, work on this
2. My mother does want me to do "something with computers" because
2.a. something about them being the future
2.a.i. my mother's expertise on this topic: nil
2.b. something about opening up vast fields of gainful employment
3. My mother will strongly, nay, vehemently deny points 1 and 2.a.i
3.a. point 1 is however strongly enough implied to justify the deployment of logic to back her into a corner on the topic
4. Not unlike a mongoose the cornered mother is dangerous and will persist in claiming that everyone has grossly misinterpreted her clear, concise and rational discussion
4.a. this is commonly known as "bullshit"
5. My final decision will have to be made completely independently of my mother
5.a. because it's really quite difficult to sift the good advice out of the layers upon layers of
5.a.i. misconceptions
5.a.ii. parent-child projection
5.a.iii. emotional blackmail
5.a.iv. really stubborn misconceptions
5.a.v. defensive posturing
5.b. I don't think that's really sunk in with her
5.b.i. although I've tried to be blunt
6. If my final decision is pointing in a sort of queenslandy direction I can expect
6.a. further argument
6.a.i. identical to this one
6.a.ii. ad infinitum
6.b. little support
6.b.i. financially (we're SITKOMs, it's horrible)
6.b.ii. logistically
6.b.iii. emotionally (until she hits the "acceptance" stage)
In sum: look! A comedienne!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-12-23 04:36 pm (UTC)But whoah! Your organised and logical points of information, how I swoon at them! ;D
Though to be honest, don't you do a little too much with computers these days, as it is? *g*
no subject
Date: 2007-12-23 05:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-23 06:15 pm (UTC)In another odd twist of fate, one of my most adorable cow-orkers had enough of our boss and moved back home to...Duluth, Minnesota. That's quickly becoming a mecca.
Re: QUT -- this is your life and your future and you seem to understand that more than anyone involved, which, really, is to be expected. I can't blame them for feeling protective, but those who're afraid and defensive don't know where protective begins and smothering begins. Best of luck maneuvering that psychological minefield. You can do this.
no subject
Date: 2007-12-30 12:17 pm (UTC)I went through the whole going-to-uni-a-long-way-away thing this time last year - I wanted to go to Sydney Uni, my mum wanted me to go to the University of Queensland, because it's closer, and I could come home on the weekends, and so on.
I think that you should go to QUT, because that's what you want to do. Since it's your life and your eventual livelihood, and it's your choice not your mum's, even though she'd like it to be (mine wished it was hers!). So, if QUT is what you really want to do, and you are able to go there, whether or not your mum wants you to go somewhere else and do something else, then go there. If she tries to play the financial angle, you could (maybe) try telling her that you'll get a job up there (or a scholarship, or both) and will pay some of it yourself.
On surviving outside the nest - you'll probably be better at it than you think you are. I had major freakouts (quietly, to myself) the whole holidays both before *and* after I decided to go to USyd, because I'd never lived away from home by myself or otherwise, apart from holidays. And it's turned out OK. Actually, when I got home from uni in November, my mum said that I'd become more confident. Which is good; I'm the kind of shy person who won't go into shops that don't already have customers in them, because then the shop assistants will talk to me.
Go for it! It's so worth it.
no subject
Date: 2007-12-30 12:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-31 06:56 am (UTC)Like the time that she got the letter from college about random guys (in a women's only college) doing cocaine in one of the bathrooms in my wing - which I had decided not to tell her about in the interests of my own sanity - and pretty much exploded.
I know that sounds pretty bad but it was nowhere near as bad as it sounds, and we got some good gossip out of it. And then they upped the uni security detail around the residential colleges, so that meant less random drunk guys in my courtyard at 3am, yay!
no subject
Date: 2007-12-31 07:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-31 07:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-31 07:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-31 09:35 am (UTC)