The Last Bastion Of Absurdity

REALLY? Cause I TOTALLY WILL.

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REALLY. I wasn't going to read it till after the HSC anyway, and i can't stand having to skip all those cut entries.

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Ron/Hermione and Harry/Ginny are MARRIED CANON. There are KIDDIES TO PROVE IT.

Snape is totally not evil. He gives Harry pertinent memories which prove that all our theories about him and Dumbledore in HBP were correct. Then he dies. :(

Harry sacrifices himself but somehow DOES NOT DIE. I haven't really worked that bit out yet.

Draco lives. Narcissa saves Harry's life near the end when he tells her that Draco is still alive.

Who else dies... Lupin, Tonks, Mad-Eye, Fred. Bellatrix. Voldemort. Molly Weasley kills Bellatrix!

There is a scene involving flight on the back of a dragon through the vaults of Gringotts.

Albus is HUMANISED. He's not all good and awesome and amazingly kind to everyone. He has Deep Dark Secrets!

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OH OH OH AND HARRY IS A HORCRUX! :O He finds this out from Snape's memories which also tell him that the only way Voldemort can die is if he kills Harry.

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Yay molly! I'm sad about Lupin :( marauders bloody generation is so bloody tragic, I expected Snape but I thought they'd at least leave ONEhappy ending... *sigh*

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It was Meaningful when Lupin died. I think. Something about giving Harry strength to do what he had to do.

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woodburner.livejournal.com

wait wait FRED????

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FRED. :(

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woodburner.livejournal.com

I.

I.

There is no god.

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That's what i said. :(

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sigma7.livejournal.com

Law of averages -- you can't toss that many kedavras about and not accidentally hit a Weasley.

But...Hedwig? Wah.

Also, Ginny totally tries to Give It Up for Harry, only to be foiled by Ron's utterly fantastic sense of timing and his magical date-rape book. I'm not really kidding.

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Wahhhh! The ending is so anti-climatic! The last chapter should so totally have never beeen there at all ever. Theres like all this BUILD UP and then everything happens. And then the book SHOULD end. BUT NOOOO it has to skip 19 years into the future and blah-blah-blah noone cares what harry names his 5 children. grrrr

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sigma7.livejournal.com

At least he didn't name them damned "Scorpius."

I pray to God that that last chapter was written years and years ago and she just left it intact on principle, because oh dear God that's an awful set of pages there.

I simply can't believe that of all the time Remus and Tonks are on the page, that they don't get more than an "oh, by they way, they're dead, and Colin, too" moment. For all we know they got hit by a car when asking directions.

I have a theory that you could edit the books and remove all references to the Malfoys and Dursleys and come out with a much better piece of work. Mmmm, okay, maybe not the Dursleys, but seriously, I have no idea what the damn point of the Malfoys is. At least give them mustaches to twirl properly.

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oh come now! what would the book been with out its Pimp? whick-whicka swish! And I was totally prepared for Harry to die at the end, and when The Architect *cough* Dumbledore gave his whole rant at the end I think I actually groaned. As if the book wouldn't have been better if harry ACTUALLY had to die, and then Neville would have to kill the big V.

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sigma7.livejournal.com

Just got home from seeing Order of the Phoenix in the theater, and I would've liked to have seen Neville do what I wanted Harry to do to Bellatrix -- seriously, just forget the Cruciatus, just take the wand and stab her. She won't be expecting that.

Along that same line, I do so love me some Trelawney.

And yes, I can't wait to see Neville in the last movie -- blood-caked, clothes torn, eyes blackened, fists clenched.... Neville is hardcore.

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Oh yes, Lucius and his phallic cane was definitely the highlight of the books for me. *g*

And thank you! Harry not dying despite being a Horcrux was such a "let's make everyone happy" sort of ending. Neville for the win. :D

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ROFL!

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shortgeekfreak.livejournal.com

RIP Fred. I seriously stared at that page for 10 miniutes not wanting to believe it. I mean, I knew we had to lose a Weasly but couldn't it at least have been Percy.

Not to meantion the eairly chapter (which I think was genius) where you alterntivley think half the order/junoir order is dead. First Hagrid, then George (again with the staring in disbelief and then relief when he only lost his ear, "holey" pure gold) and finally you find out Moody died and you're like "oh."

Bill and Fluer's wedding was made of win! Just in general.

As for the last chapter, I don't mind that the ending was happy because there was so much pain and suffering on the way through. I was freaking the whole "harry must go and and let himself be killed in the woods" bit. So it was kind of nice to see some happieness. But the writing quality seemed to drop off. JK definalty improved through the series so it was almost like going back to book one.

My worst Deaths: Headwig, Fred, Dobby, Tonks, Lupin. I didn't really care THAT much about anyone else.

Oh, and bonus points for Mrs Weasly for kicking Bellatrix's butt! :)

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You know how, in fairy tales, the hero saves the damsel in distress and basically gets to fuck her?

Well, Harry saves Draco.

Twice. :*

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Ron would just ruin the moment, anyway

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*giggles*

True, but Draco's not Ron's sister, so the boys can tell him to fuck off. :*

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Or turn it into something else entirely...

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hesfb.livejournal.com

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4evar

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