Saturday Niiiiiight!

Liza's party was t3h awesome. It really, really was. I met a whole bunch of people I didn't previously know even though half of them go to my school, I discovered the correct level of drunkenness post-warm/fuzzy but pre-throwup/passout, Amy showed up (which was odd, since she only knows Liza via primary school and msn, but a cool surprise anyway), and in general fun happened.

Strobe lights are very, very cool. Yes, oh yes they aaaaare. XDXD They induce the precise amount of dizzy you can get without falling over, and make everyone in the room who is dancing look really, really cool. Especially Sam in her Gothtop. And Alex with her hair swinging. Wheeee. It also makes you feel less self-conscious about dancing, because you know strobe lights can make ANYTHING look cool. Although that might've been the alcohol. But meh, whatever.

I didn't actually have that much. I discarded my Lemon Ruski before I got through half of it, because it tasted like shit, in favour of something nice and Peach, possibly involving Smirnoff. I almost finished that. Except I put it down to dance and someone made off with it :P. And I had sips of various things throughout the night, including a vile green concoction of Vals involving midori and absolut vodka, which burned my ears. Sam had a weird purple bottle with something sickly sweet in it. And cool goth gloves XD I tried them on... the wrong way round!

There was a circle set up in the backyard with some mutated cross between spin-the-bottle and truth or dare. Basically, you spin a bottle and truthordare whoever it lands on. But if they choose dare, it invariably involves kissing, because no-one had enough imagination to come up with anything original. There was a bit of a running joke with daring people to kiss Bob, for some reason. When in doubt, invade Venezuela and/or kiss Bob.

Oh, yeah, went to Avi's before the party to play Risk with him and Stan and Jess and Raymond. Obviously we all got pwned by Avi, who was the only one who'd played the game before. I had most of Africa and South America, while Jess and Raymond fought over middle Asia and Australia, and EVERYONE beat up on Stan, who was in central Europe, but then Avi came out of North america and steamrolled through all my forces, closely followed by Stan's and Jess's, leaving a final showdown with Ray in western Australia. Guess who won.

Anyway, after I got tired of both watching people kiss Bob and dancing, I went into the computer room where people were playing poker to play guitar a little, and spent about fiteen minutes fiddling with wires before realising I haveta switch the amplifier ON. I taught either Elaine or Karen, or possibly someone else, I forget, a Spanish Excercise, and then played Big Two with Avi, Stan, Amy and one of Liza's other Asian school people. I remember most of the names, and the faces, i just can't put them together :(. I wanted to play Durak but nobody could be bothered teaching people how to play.

I spent rest of the night until my dad picked me up around eleven sitting in a tight group Liza's steps chatting, giggling at photos and people stealing Mick's hat, and listening to Alison's words of wisdom. That girl is SUCH a cute drunk. "I can't see anything... I think my eyes are closed..." And people tell her to just go to sleep, and she goes: But I keep being awake... *falls onto Mick's shoulder*

I wanted to sleep over, but the whole lice thing - my parents decided I shouldn't risk it. And that meant i couldn't stay too late cos my dad had to pick me up, and he has an early-morning wake up call in my brother, so he needs his sleep. And therefore I couldn't stay till midnight. Anyway, we got about halfway home, and suddenly I remembered my backpack in Liza's bedroom... woops! So we made a Uturn and I turned up at the door again going "LIIIIZA! I forgot my baaaag!" My dad was like "Heh, you can tell them you changed your mind and you're sleeping over after all." And I was like "Can i?!" and he was like "no."

So I got my bag, fiddled with the car radio (WHY is latenight radio always so BAD?!) and sang along to "Dare You to Move" allll the way home :P

More Drabble-matic, inspired by Liza's party XP

I'm Dreaming Of A Flashy Christmas

It was Christmas Eve. Emma sat leerily in Liza's closet, sipping random eggnog.

She looked at the ace bottle hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Bob had hung it there, just before they looked at each other wobblingly and then fell into each other's arms and licked each other's arm.

If only I hadn't been so suspicious, Emma thought, pouring a awesome amount of rum into her eggnog. Then Bob might not have got so full on and left me all alone at Christmas time. She wiped away a beautiful tear and held her cheek in her hand.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a lovely voice lifted oglingly up in song.



I'm dreaming of a flashy Christmas

Just like a drunk throwing up on the lawn



Emma ran to the door. It was Bob, looking pretty all over with snow.

"I missed you drunkenly," Bob said. "And I wanted to lick your arm again."

Emma hugged Bob and started to sob.

"I think you're drunk," Bob said.

"I think so too," Emma said and they licked each other's arm until they knocked the Christmas tree over.

On Christmas Day, they ate roasted drunk neck and lived cutely until Emma got drunk again.

http://www.arts.unsw.edu.au/polisoc/FunnyWiseStuff.htm - GO THERE.

In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and someone to actually show up and do the revolting. Dress is usually casual and both parties may be flexible about time and place but if either faction fails to attend, the whole enterprise is likely to come off badly. In the Chinese Revolution of 1650 neither party showed up and the deposit on the hall was forfeited.

...

A fine example of a demonstration was the Boston Tea Party, where outraged Americans disguised as Indians dumped British tea into the harbour. Later, Indians disguised as outraged Americans dumped actual British into the harbour. Following that, the British, disguised as tea, dumped each other into the harbour. Finally, German mercenaries clad only in costumes from The Trojan Women leapt into the harbour for no apparent reason.

And finally.... THE one and only, ORIGINAL cow joke!! And it does NOT start with "So this farmer had this cow, right..." so THERE Toly!

Socialism: You have two cows; you give one to your neighbour
Communism: You have two cows; the government takes both and gives you the milk
Fascism: You have two cows; the government takes both and sells you the milk
Nazism: You have two cows; the government takes both and shoots you
Bureaucratism: You have two cows; the government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away.
Capitalism: You have two cows; you sell one and buy a bull. Produce more cows and more milk and sell the milk at high prices to buy larger paddocks to produce more cows and more milk.
Anarchism: Keep the cows. Steal another one. Shoot the government.