(no subject)

[bliumchik]

Hey Mel, check out snarry_olympics, you might like it.

I have an entry, but it's not ready to post, so here's an excerpt from a drarry crack!fic I started in legal studies. Well, Mel and Diana were writing sappy fluff, so I figured...

"What's the problem?" Malfoy asked. "I hate my father, you hate my father, you obviously can't resist my wiles..."

"You have wiles?" Harry said crossly. "You just sort of jumped on me. And you smudged my essay, look! ...Hang on, you're doing this to annoy your dad?!"

Malfoy pouted. "He won't let me play loud music in my room. And he keeps dressing me up like a doll for dinner parties. And he's never happy with my marks, and he says I can't paint my room black and put up Evanescence posters, and I can't have the newest racing broomstick till I beat you at Quidditch, and he wants me to kill Dumbledore, and he just doesn't understand me, you know?"

Harry blinked. "You like Evanescence! You're plotting to kill... you like Evanescence? They're muggles!"

"But they totally understand my pain! Anyway, you understand - this whole Death Eater thing was the last straw. So obviously my only two options were grisly suicide and shagging Harry Potter." Malfoy flashed a hopeful grin.

"And you couldn't have gone with the suicide?"

"Come on, Potter!" Malfoy whined, "It would piss him off sooo much! Don't you want that?"

Harry scratched his head. "You know, there is a way to do that without molesting me in the library."

"There is?" Malfoy sounded almost disappointed.

"Yeah, you could, I don't know, join the side of light or something."

"Is that some sort of innuendo?"

"Malfoy," Harry said, gently banging his forehead on the table, "In what language does 'join the side of light' translate to 'climb into my lap and do unspeakable things to me'?"

tbc

ETA: Who the hell is dropping in from Thailand?! Do I know anyone in Thailand? Show thyself! Or, you know, not, if you don't want to. But, just, wtf?!

Comments

[mayuki-miyazawa.livejournal.com]

..... Still needs more Snarry secks.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 SNAPE!!!!!!!

I wrote a song.

His eyes are as black as a hamburger pattie,
His hair as dark as a laddie!
I wish he was mine,
He's really devine!
The potions master that stole Harry Potter's virginity!

[maggiebloome.livejournal.com]

I'm not going to dignify that with a response.